Saturday, December 23

The Box Part 2

For ten years now we've dug the box out of our Christmas things, opened it, looked at each little stocking, given each other sad smiles and a hug, and then closed it back up and placed the box on our tree. But this year as I was holding the box in my hand, my four-year-old son asked, "What's in that box?"

The question didn't surprise me or catch me off guard exactly, but I hadn't anticipated having this conversation during our tree trimming celebration. My husband sat down next to me, and we pulled our two precious children close to us as we told them about the box. They had more questions, some of which we had answers for and some we didn't. Then they were satisfied and we went back to decorating this year's Christmas tree.

What a joy the last four Christmases have been! Sometimes I am overcome by the simplest things that remind me how very blessed I am to be a Mommy. As I watched my children excitedly running back and forth between the box of ornaments and the tree, my heart skipped a beat and my eyes filled with tears. It was one of those moments I had dreamed about all those long years when I was aching for children. The joy and fulfillment (and, yes, challenges) they bring don't erase the pain and sadness of the years we collected the stockings, but it gives our joy depth and richness and a perspective I am grateful for.

Though I should have known better, I assumed the kids would forget about the box until next year. But it had an impact, and they are still thinking about it. Abby has been talking about her brothers and sisters in heaven and how she can't wait to give them all a hug. And as I was pushing our grocery cart to the van this week, Ryan looked up and me and said, "Mommy, will you tell me about the box of stockings again?" Yes, Ryan, I would be happy to.

1 comment:

DebbieLynne said...

These two posts brought tears to my eyes. I remember being with you on a Mother's Day after another baby had gone to Jesus, and I ached for you that day. I am so grateful for Ryan and Abby. And I'm glad they can now remember their siblings, especially on Christmas.


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