I've been pondering a couple things the last couple of days. The first is very near and dear to my heart...adoption. A friend of mine just found out they will be adopting a 21-month-old little girl, and they will be getting her this weekend! It's been interesting to watch the process as an outsider this time instead of as the participant. The emotions and fears are often so intense, then, strangely, the next moment there's ambivilence, giving rise to the sensation of being on a roller coaster ride of unknown duration.
But the amazing and precious thing to me is how I heard the change in her voice the day she told me they were chosen to be her parents. Gone was the ambivalence, gone were the fears (for the moment, anyway), and all I heard in her voice was excitement and love for this new daughter whom they have never even met! How can people not believe in God when you see that kind of capacity for love? Surely, only the Lord is able to make love flow from hearts of mere men in such a powerful way.
I am so grateful to have been adopted into God's family and to have been blessed to adopt two beautiful children. I know my friend and her family will have their ups and downs with this little girl, but what a blessing she is to them...and them to her!
The second thing that's been rolling around in my thoughts lately is marriage. I've watched marriages come and go, I've witnessed couples pull their marriages back together after devastating actions by one or both spouses, and I've seen others who have frittered away their marriage giving it less thought than they give to their wardrobe.
What's the key to a successful marriage? I don't mean successful in the sense that a couple manages to tolerate each other enough to stay married, but successful in the sense that both husband and wife are growing and love each other's company and work through conflicts instead of ignoring them.
After over 12 years of marriage, I certainly know there's no formula, but I am becoming more and more convinced that next to an unwavering committment on the part of both spouses, selflessness is paramount to a healthy marriage. Duh. I'm as selfish as the next person, but starting today, my goal for this year is to learn to be as selfless as possible, particularly in regard to my hubby. I am grateful that I have a Lord who can enable me to do this as I trust Him to change me and mold me into His image! I love you, Eddie!
1 comment:
David and I celebrated our 20th anniversary last week, and this post has given me lots of food for thought. I realized as I read it that I have become less thoughtful over the years.
When we were first married everything was about Dave and his comfort. Then we added the kids (one by one till we have 7!) and Julia's special needs take up SOOOOO much time.
Reading your post, I went back in my mind to the first few years of our marriage and realized that while we have a GREAT marriage and love each other to death, that there are lots of things I can do to take us back to the beginning.
THANK YOU!!! And I garantee David thanks you, too!
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